Is Your Child Ready? Know the Signs

There's no age set-in-stone for toddlers to start potty training. According to experts from babycenter.com, most toddlers can start to potty train before they are two-years-old.

"Many children develop the necessary physical and cognitive skills between 18 to 24 months. (Though some aren't ready to start until they're as old as four.)"

They say the real harm is pushing your child to potty train before he/she is ready.

In her book Toilet Training: A Practical Guide to Daytime and Nighttime Training, Vicki Lansky says your child needs to be able to communicate their bathroom needs. These are some things she says to look for:

"Is [your child] aware of the need to go; can [your child] understand "wet," "potty" and related words; [does your child] dislike dirty or wet diapers [and] asks to use the potty or toilet."

Here are more signs to look for when determining if your child is ready to potty train:

• Does my child seem interested in going, talking about or watching other people potty?

• Does my child let me know if he/she is wet or has had a bowel movement?

• Does my child wake up dry after naps or in the morning?

• Does my child have predictable times that they have bowl movements?

• If the child has an older sibling, does the child seem interested in watching him/her go potty?

If you answered "yes" to most of these questions, then your child could be ready to start potty training. The real question is -- Are you ready to train your child?

> Want more help? Take a potty training quiz from iVillage.com: Is your child ready to potty train?

Tools of the Trade

Picking a Potty
There are several different choices when it comes to picking a toilet training potty for your child. If you decide to purchase a smaller, separate potty, there are several features you can choose from:

• Potties shaped like dinosaurs, animals, etc.

• Potties with guards to protect little boys from getting sprayed when they are first learning

• Potties that play music when the child has been successful

• Potties with cushioned seats

• Inflatable potties

Toilet Trainers
You can also purchase adapters that fit in the seat on a normal toilet, if the child is not comfortable on the big seat alone. There are several deferent versions:

• Trainers featuring cartoon characters

• Trainers that flip up to convert into a regular toilet seat.

• Trainers that are padded

Accessories
There are also accessories that you can purchase to help make potty training more convenient or fun.

• Stools (to help your child get up on the large toilet)

• Toilet targets to help boys aim

• Toilet covers featuring cartoon characters

Not having to carry diapers will definitely lighten the load in your diaper bag, but you will still need to carry some supplies for potty training. Although there are several portable potties, seats and other gadgets you can tote around, it's a safe bet to always bring a couple of extra sets of clothing, including underwear, socks, and shoes. According to Murphy's Law, when you take a potty training toddler on an outing and don't bring extra clothes, they'll have an accident. So don't forget the clothes!

Potty Training Methods

It seems like everyone has their own theories on what works in regard to potty training. If you take a poll in Relief Society, probably each sister has a different tried-and-true method. Instead of getting overwhelmed with all the choices, try to look at them as different options to try. Here are some of the more popular ones:

The Naked Method
Yes, that's right. Some experts recommend that you should simply let your kids go without diapers, training pants, etc., and go natural. This is a method that worked for me when nothing else would!

After trying every potty training method, including bribery and taking him on a schedule, my nearly three-year-old boy refused to use the toilet He would go hide in his room and do his business and then come tell me. I asked the pediatrician what I should do and he recommended letting him go naked. I thought he was crazy, but since I was a stay-at-home mom at the time, I decided to try it. After about a week he was potty trained. The downside to letting him go naked was the messes to clean up. So be prepared if you use this method.

The Frequency Method
With this method, you take the child to the bathroom frequently throughout the day to preempt any accidents.

"With this system you have to be persistent and have a lot of patience, " Kathy Nutall (Ralston/La-Vista Ward, Papillion Nebraska Stake, USA) and mother of nine, said. "When my children showed signs of being ready, like being dry after naps or telling me they were wet or poopy, I decided it was time to potty train. I...[took] them in the bathroom every 30 minutes, even if they didn't tell me they needed to go. ...after about a month, they were done and fully potty trained."

Experts say you should also watch for signs that your child needs to use the bathroom.

"You should watch your toddler for grabbing or swaying back and forth," Edward R. Christophersen, Ph.D., said on babycenter.com. "This is a sign that they have to go.”

The Modeling Method also known as the Dr. Phil Method
In a fall 2002 episode of the Dr. Phil show, Dr. Phil Mcgraw talked to parents about potty training. He claimed that most children can learn to use the potty in a day through a method of modeling and positive reinforcement.

He suggests getting a doll that wets and dress it and your child in big-kid underwear. Also, have your child name the doll. Give the doll and your child plenty of fluids and ask your child to help you take the doll to the bathroom. Have your child watch as you pull down the doll's big-kid underwear, and it goes potty on the potty chair. Immediately afterwards, bring the doll and child back to the family room and throw a party for the doll, complete with streamers, confetti, party horns, hats, and more fluids. Tell your child that you will have a party for him/her when he/she uses the potty. Your child can also call their favorite super hero and tell them the news. Ask your child if he/she would like to use the potty. Keep doing this routine until the child uses the potty. Once he/she does, immediately throw a fun party, similar to the doll's, and let your child call their favorite super hero, with the help of a family member of friend.

What if the child has an accident? Dr. Phil says it's important not to get upset.

"If your child has an accident in his/her underwear, don't scold him/her," Dr Phil said. "You want this to be a positive experience. Instead, take your child to the potty, pull his/her underwear down, and have your child sit down. Do this nine times. This builds muscle memory and your child will eventually go."

With Dr. Phil's method, he cautions against using any type of training diaper that you can pull up and down. He say your child should be wearing big-kid underwear for this method to work properly.

> Read more about his method from Dr. Phil's website.

The Positive Reinforcement Method
Whether it be stickers on a chart, M & Ms or a new toy, some parents find rewards are the key to potty training.

"I thought if I rewarded her, maybe she'd be able to go on the toilet," Kindra Taylor (Cottonwood Ward, Papillion Nebraska Stake, USA) said. "We got stickers, cars, hair pretties and things like that, [and] we told her she'd only get one if she went potty and kept her underwear dry. We had a few accidents for a while but it started working! "

The Disposable Training Pants Method aka the Pull-Ups® / Easy-Ups® Method
Controversial among experts, the disposable training pants method is a favorite among some parents. Absorbent like diapers but convenient like underwear, these seem the best of both worlds.

Mother of a two-year-old, Kathleen Gordon-Ross (Lawrence 2nd Ward, Topeka Kansas Stake, USA) was amazed when her daughter came downstairs and declared she wanted to wear underpants.

"After a disastrous weekend of accidents and NEVER peeing or pooping ON the potty chair, my husband and I decided that neither our daughter or us were quite ready for underpants."

But her daughter was insistent on not wearing diapers anymore, so Kathleen and her husband turned to the next best thing - disposable underpants.

"Just like the commercial, they look and feel like underpants and make the transition from diapers to underpants so much easier! My daughter loves them and they have really made potty training an easier process for me...Some brands even change color slightly when they've had an 'accident.' Another nice feature - the sides tear apart easily for messier accidents."

Some experts warn against using disposable training pants, however. They say it might delay the potty training process.

"Our practice does not recommend the use of “Pull-Up” disposable diapers," Dr. Greg Germain, attending pediatrician and an associate clinical professor of pediatrics at Yale-New Haven Children's Hospital, said. "They can stand in the way of making that final step to routinely using the potty since a bulky wet diaper can be a potty training motivating force."

Pull-Ups® is a registered trademark of the Kimberly-Clark Worldwide Corporation.

Easy-Ups® is a registered trademark of Proctor & Gamble.

Potty Training Boys

Potty training boys can be another challenge. Many experts agree that potty training boys is more difficult and takes longer than girls.

In a recent study on potty training conducted by a group of pediatricians in Wisconsin (Pediatrics, March 2002), girls showed an interest in potty training earlier than boys and reached milestones before boys.

Experts say you can do some creative things to help boys potty train and learn to aim.

"Teach [a] boy to aim accurately by having him 'sink the battleship,'" Vicky said. "Float the corner of the envelope or a piece of toilet paper in the toilet and have him aim at it. Cheerios, we hear, are also popular for target practice!"

She says you can even go as far as actually painting a bulls eye in your toilet bowl. To do this, drain the water from the bowl and paint a red target with fingernail polish on the porcelain towards the back. You could also use a red grease pencil.

Vicky goes on to say you can show your little boy a magic trick, by having him make the blue water in the toilet turn green, by going potty.

Have Patience

Success in potty training is not going to be instantaneous. It may take quite awhile or if you are lucky, it may be fairly short. Not every child is going to train the same way at the same age, even if they are
siblings. Once your think your child is potty trained, don't take it for granted. He/she could still have accidents for awhile even after they have "graduated" to underwear.

Most of all, HAVE PATIENCE! With potty training, it will be frustrating at times. There will be times when you will think, “I've had it. Let's go back to diapers.” Doing so, however, will only confuse the child. Make sure when you start potty training, that you are ready and will not turn back.

Just remember, there is not a set way or time that you can train your child. When you and your child are ready, you will be on your way to NO MORE DIAPERS!