“We were all just so busy and things were pretty crazy,” Connie Richardson, Lawrence 2nd Ward, Topeka, KS Stake, said. “We knew we had to simply and prioritize our lives.”

Connie is the mother of six children, ranging from toddler-aged to preteen. Their life can get pretty hectic. But, a word from a modern-day prophet encouraged them to reevaluate their lives. At the April 2002 General Conference, the Richardsons heard President Hinckley talk about the need for us to simplify our lives as families.

“After the talk our family decided to have a family home evening about how we could simply our lives,” the Richardson’s nine-year-old daughter said in a primary talk.

During FHE, the Richardsons wrote down every activity their family did—school-related, extra-curricular-related, and even church-related.

“With church activities,” Connie said, “some things are optional, and some things are required.”
After they completed their list of activities, they prioritized.

“We decided the best way to do this was to color-code our activities," Connie said.

Things like church attendance, family counsel, family home evening, temple worship, family scripture study, basic body/health care, etc., fit their highest priority. These activities would be color-coded red, for example. Connie said these were the essentials, the things that really mattered in life.

Next came other important activities, but not as vital as the first category. This category could be blue, for example. These items included church callings, church activities-like ward parties, firesides, etc.

Other categories down the line could include hobbies, extracurricular activities, etc. This could be coded yellow, for example.

“We found that prioritizing made a big difference for our kids' lives,” Connie said. “You just can’t do it all. Having a list of priorities made it easier to see what’s important. If one of the kids wanted to go swimming, for example, then we would look at our list of priorities. We make sure the high levels were completed before we go on to the next.”

So when it came down to it, did the Richardsons cut a lot of activities out of their busy lives?
“We really didn’t cut too many things out, we just decided which were the priorities,” Connie said. “We let the kids pick one or two extracurricular activities at a time. Right now our daughter is trying to decide between girl scouts and extra dance classes. She has to decide. She can’t do both.”

Experts agree with the Richardsons.

According to a survey of American teachers by Metlife in 2000, 76 percent of children today are over-scheduled, resulting in kids who are anxious, stressed and even profoundly unhappy.

According to experts at Parent’s Soup, “[Kids] spend so much time on structured activities that they often miss some of the most important experiences of childhood -- experiences that form the foundation for happy, fulfilling adult lives. These children don’t have time to explore the world at their own pace, to develop their own unique set of interests and to indulge in the sort of creative fantasy play that helps them figure out who they really are. And, too often, they fail to learn how to sensibly schedule their own time.”

And thanks to the conference talk, the Richardsons are trying to simply their lives and focus on what really matters.

And what about quitting an activity? The Richardsons say that once their kids have made a commitment to an activity, they stick with it for the length of the commitment.

“Before we decide to do an activity, we really talk though it a lot beforehand,” Connie said. They have tried some activities on a month trial period to see if they can handle it."

Connie says the seasons for sports/activities are generally pretty short, so that kids aren’t making a lifelong commitment. She says quitting sends the wrong message to kids.

“If your child is stressed or overloaded, then it’s time to examine priorities,” Connie said. “That’s a big difference between that and quitting just because [the activity] is hard.”

And is their system working? For now, the Richardsons say, “Yes.”

“It’s easy for things to get overloaded pretty quickly. We should continue to reevaluate.”

To Quit or Not to Quit: That is the Question
by Lori Garcia, editor-in-chief

I once faked a “broken toe” injury to get out of track practice. It was 8th grade. I was in junior high, and I do not have the body of a runner. I had ran track in the 7th grade, and I, like many of the non-athletic types in the track program, got put into the “distance” category. (I think it was just a way to get kids to quit.) I had never ran so much in my life! I ran the half-mile and mile races. And yes, I finished last or very close to it just about every race. (Once I beat one of the star distance runners on our track team. My only victory. I was so proud. No, I wasn’t better by any stretch of the imagination. That star runner had a sprained ankle from a race she had run just minutes before.) But even with all the losing I did, I stuck with track. (Even when running a race one afternoon, onlookers jeered at me saying, “look at the little bumble bee go.” –Our outfits were black and yellow-striped tank tops and shorts.) My parents were adamant that we were NOT a family of quitters.

So, even though I was the worst distance runner West Junior High had seen in years, I stuck with it. Apparently, though, I didn’t know when to cut my losses. The following year all of my friends were going out for track, and of course, so did I. We all had starry-eyed dreams of running hurtles. This would be a good part of the story where I would tell you my determination and hard work paid off, but this is a real story about a real person, and some of us were not meant to be runners. So, as you have already guessed, I didn’t make the hurtle team, in fact, only one of my friends in our group did. When I got the news that I was once again in the distance team, I panicked. I had been tortured enough for many lifetimes! Instead of facing my fears and talking to my parents and coach, I used a “stumped toe incident” as my way out. I hobbled into class for days complaining of my track injury. I was pretty convincing too, except when my best friend aptly reminded me that it was the “other” toe that was hurt…OOPS!

The point of my little story is not to embarrass myself but to share my story of determination. Since our family was NOT a family of quitters, I stuck with track, even though I pretty much lost every race. After sticking out that first year, I should have evaluated the situation, and made a better choice on future track endeavors. It’s not quitting after you have given your all, done your best, ran your race, and then realized it was just not for you.