The Divine Role of Motherhood
by Heather Hales, senior editor

With Mother’s Day this month it is hard not to reflect on the role mothers have in our Heavenly Father’s Plan. It is a divine calling entrusted to women, the power by which life is perpetuated.

But, motherhood is not just for those who bear children, it is a divine calling for all women, we are inherently mothers. "…righteous women were endowed premortally with the privilege of motherhood. Motherhood is more than bearing children, though certainly it is that. It is the essence of who we are as women. It defines our very identity, our divine stature and nature, and the unique traits our Father gave us." (1)

For those who will not bear children in this life, the role of motherhood is still yours.  Sister Starko had this to say about motherhood, “The sacred role of motherhood is not defined solely by the physical process of giving birth. In fact, I suspect that some who have borne children would not be honored by our Heavenly Father with the cherished title of mother. I believe that the eternal role of motherhood has more to do with the teaching and nurturing of spirits than with physical birth and early mortal caretaking. I know it’s important to provide Heavenly Father’s children with healthy bodies and safe homes, but that must be only the beginning of being a mother.

I believe that motherhood in the eternal sense is developed through sacrifice, service, and love. For most women the greatest opportunities to develop nurturing talents come with the birth of their own children. However, those of us who do not bear children can develop qualities of eternal motherhood in other ways. I’ve felt the love of motherhood when I’ve counseled with teenage girls about their eternal destiny, their Heavenly Father’s love, and the wonder of the gospel. I have felt that love as I’ve laughed and cried with Relief Society sisters, as I’ve worked in the temple, and as I’ve cherished children I’ve taught in and out of church. Even if we don’t have children of our own, we can serve as mothers to people young and old throughout our adult lives, teaching and loving and helping them find their way back to Heavenly Father." (2)

Sister Dew confirms the principle that mothers are those who lead, “And we each have the responsibility to love and help lead the rising generation.  How will our young women learn to live as women of God unless they see what women of God look like, meaning what we wear, watch, and read; how we fill our time and our minds; how we face temptation and uncertainty; where we find true joy; and why modesty and femininity are hallmarks of righteous women? How will our young men learn to value women of God if we do not show them the virtue of our virtues?

We are all mothers in Israel, and our calling is to love and lead the rising generation through the dangerous streets of mortality." (1)

I have recently been blessed with a beautiful little boy and am amazed that our Heavenly Father trusts me to raise his child. I feel so inadequate and wonder daily if I can be the mother that my Heavenly Father wants me to be. It is truly amazing that our Heavenly Father trusts us women to raise his future generations, that through our actions as mothers we can spread the gospel to distant lands and for many generations.

Sister Cheryl Cole Burr teaches us how we can better ourselves as mothers, through Christ’s example:

"After studying the life of Jesus Christ, my goal as a mother became to have my children come to the Lord and also to me—to give them the time and attention they deserve, even when I’m not quite feeling up to it. As I have worked toward developing this kind of atmosphere in our home, I have discovered several ways to encourage my children to come to me—that is, to feel a stronger sense of understanding, peace, and comfort in my presence. Moreover, the following points have helped me to more successfully respond to the demands of motherhood.

• The first thing I do is make a conscious effort to change the way I look at motherhood, especially during stressful moments when a child is crying or covered in dirt or refuses to obey. I try to think eternally, remembering my role as a mother in the eternal scheme of things. I’ve found that my children somehow sense when I am seeing things with an eternal perspective, and our interactions are more peaceful and patient.

• When I feel tense or pushed to the breaking point, I ask myself what the Lord might do in a similar situation, and then I follow what I think His example would be. Usually this requires adjusting my goals or priorities to match those of the Savior. Switching gears is hard, but having my children come to me in moments of upset has enriched the love I feel for them and for motherhood.

I’ve learned that in tense moments, sitting down with my children gathered around me can be calming and peaceful. Sometimes I hold each child and tell them one at a time how grateful I am that Heavenly Father sent them to my husband and me. Together we read books and scriptures or sing Primary songs.

• Often I bear my testimony that Heavenly Father wants me to be their mother, and I promise them I will always try my hardest to do a good job. I remind us all that we can be with Heavenly Father again, as a family, and we talk about how glad we are to be together.

As I bear my testimony to my children, the Spirit often softens my heart and I feel a stronger love for my children. I feel my burdens slowly lift as I look at life and my children with an eternal perspective in mind.

• I try to include my children in whatever I’m doing. If I’m cooking dinner, I may give everyone a job in the kitchen. My children love to sweep, vacuum, put away clean dishes, wrap potatoes in aluminum foil, and help out in a number of ways. Sometimes when I’m preparing a lesson for Primary Sharing Time, the children will engage in a similar activity, such as cutting figures out of their coloring books. We enjoy the feeling of working together, side by side.

• I have found that prayer has greatly increased my ability to cope with the demands of motherhood and to enhance my relationship with my children. There are times when I want to lock myself alone in my bedroom for a good cry. When I feel this low, I pray for an increase of patience, understanding, and love toward my children. I pray for guidance and specific ideas that will help my children come to me and all of us to come to Christ. Sometimes when I pray, I am blessed to feel confident and capable; other times I have a particular idea come to mind. I always feel strength from my Savior, buoying me up and comforting me." (3)

May we all learn to better understand our right of motherhood and that we fulfill it to the best of our ability in what ever capacity we can.

1. Sheri L. Dew, “Are We Not All Mothers?,” Ensign, Nov. 2001, 96

2. Alane Starko, “A Special Kind of Mother,” Ensign, Aug. 1995, 52

3. Cheryl Cole Burr, “A Better Mother, with the Lord’s Help,” Ensign, July 2001, 72

What motherhood
means to me...

I have always thought of myself as a mother—to my siblings, my friends, and my stuffed animals. Even without my own children I feel a certain divine assurance that my love and caring for other children makes me a mother to them. I know that Heavenly Father has a special place in his heart for those who mother—whether they mother their own children or others. It is without a doubt one of the most sacred, holiest callings any lifetime has to offer. -An expecting Mother